I spent years thinking your “why” was supposed to sound profound. Turns out mine had already happened.
People love asking entrepreneurs:
“What’s your why?”
And for the longest time, I thought I needed some beautiful answer.
Something inspirational.
Something worthy of being printed in cursive on a wall.
But the older I get, the more I realize my why isn't something I had to invent.
I already lived it.
My Story Explains the Whole Damn Thing
I spent years in corporate America as an executive assistant and IT project manager.
Then COVID happened.
My career changed.
I built my own VA business.
I worked with incredible clients.
I made over $300K on Upwork.
I built an agency.
I started coaching other VAs.
And somewhere in all of that, the thing I was supposed to be looking for was sitting right in front of me.
My story was my why.
Every part of it explains why I care so much about helping other people recognize the value of what they already know.
Because I've had to do it too.
You Don't Need a Dramatic Origin Story
This is where people get stuck.
They think their story needs a movie-worthy plot.
It doesn't.
Your story might simply be:
I was really good at this job.
I realized people needed this skill.
I started charging for it.
Then I discovered I was even better at something else.
That's still a story.
What matters is that it's yours.
The jobs you've had.
The mistakes you've made.
The things you've survived.
The skills you picked up accidentally.
The moments that made you change direction.
The things you refuse to compromise on now.
They're all telling people something about you.
Your Credo Isn't Your Résumé
If someone asks who you are, I don't want to hear you recite LinkedIn.
“I am a highly experienced professional with...”
Girl.
Come back.
Tell me who you are.
Tell me where you came from.
Tell me what happened.
Tell me what you learned.
Tell me why you give a damn about the work you're doing now.
That's the interesting part.
A good introduction doesn't need your entire life story.
It just needs enough of your story for somebody to understand the person standing in front of them.
Mine Keeps Changing Because I Keep Changing
My story isn't only:
Corporate Monica became Entrepreneur Monica.
There's more to me than that.
I'm a coach.
I'm a business owner.
I'm a writer.
I'm the woman behind The XXX Files, where Minx gets to romanticize, laugh at, and occasionally drag my freelance history.
I'm also a woman whose life has changed outside of business.
All of those versions belong to me.
And I don't have to chop myself into pieces depending on which room I'm standing in.
That's probably one of my favorite things I've learned about building a personal brand.
The person is the brand.
The platforms are just where she happens to show up.
Own the Parts You Used to Downplay
Sometimes your strongest story is hiding inside something you've been treating like a footnote.
Maybe you've been an assistant for fifteen years and keep saying you're “just” an assistant.
Maybe you rebuilt your career after getting laid off.
Maybe you taught yourself something because nobody else was going to teach you.
Maybe you've worked across three completely different industries and assumed that made your career look messy.
Maybe the mess is the interesting part.
You don't have to make your story prettier.
You need to recognize what's already in it.
So What's My Why?
I want women to recognize their value.
I want freelancers to understand that their experience counts.
I want people to build careers and lives that actually belong to them.
I want somebody who has spent years thinking, “I'm just a...” to finally look at everything she's done and realize:
Oh.
I'm every woman I've had to become to get here.
Corporate Monica.
Freelancer Monica.
Agency-owner Monica.
Coach Monica.
Writer Monica.
Minx.
Same woman.
Same story.
And every chapter explains the next one.
That's my why.
I didn't have to create it.
I had to own it.
CURRENT MOOD
“I’m Every Woman” by Chaka Khan.
There really wasn't another choice.
Because your story isn't always about becoming one perfectly packaged version of yourself.
Sometimes it's recognizing every version that got you here.
The professional.
The entrepreneur.
The coach.
The writer.
The woman figuring her shit out in real time.
They're all me.
And I'm keeping every damn one of them.
Listen to “I’m Every Woman” by Chaka Khan on YouTube
PEAK OF THE WEEK
Realizing I can introduce myself without trying to squeeze twenty years of my life into a list of job titles.
My story already connects the dots.
I just have to tell it.
#EveryWomanEveryChapter
XXX,
M💋
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